Don't beat a horse if it's already dead!

Recent experiences make me cringe to think about how you can find some one attractive initially and then wham it hits you, "Not Attractive. what was I thinking!" On this note I have decided also to be a bit more open minded when I am not always initially attracted to some one.

My perspective comes from the fact a guy that I recently sort of had a date with, denies the fact that it was a date. When I pressed him a bit further he was even more wishy washy and so I just told him straight up that we were just friends. I guess main point is that I don't want a guy who can't stand up and make it clear even if it means that his ego is bruised a bit. Then ( oh and all of this through text even when he constantly says " I know you don't like having conversations through texting", yet still does it!) he tells me he was sorry and proceeded to act in accordance with everything of not just acting like a friend. I know now that some men are just clueless. So on this search of mine for a healthy relationship I have decided that just because I am initially attracted to some one does not mean that he will stay that way, and so why can't it be that even if you aren't initially attracted to a guy that it can't blossom in to something with so much more depth than a stalker. I mean yes I know that with out a doubt whom ever I end up with I MUST be attracted to, because other wise how could I get intimate with him on any level. But just like I don't only want a man to go after me for my looks so why do I constantly go after a guy because of his? Am I my own double standard? But to get back on the men out there who don't want to bruise their egos:
1) girls like a guy who are risk takers in love, so even if she says no take that risk, other girls notice that you weren't afraid to ask and maybe the next time it won't be a no.
2) If you want to take her out on a date then do not say " hey you want to hang out?" Ask her on a date. if you do in fact just want to hang out then say that, be clear about your intentions so that a girl won't be misled. if you want it to be a date but have previously been just friends, make sure she knows that this time it is because might be interested in more. I think there is much to muddy water around that could have been avoided if you keep dirt away from the water. yes it is okay to want to hang out just as friends, but at some point one or the other will be asking questions so clear it up.
3) Don't text a girl that you want to take out, that also shows that you are scared. Call her or ask her in person. Hmm maybe do it like the did in the "old days" you know before all this technology. Just like you wouldn't break up with some one through a text you shouldn't ask them out through a text.
4) And most importantly don't beat a horse if its dead, if you guys went out once and she isn't calling or texting you back she is not into you. So don't all of a sudden out of the blue try to clear things up. It is confusing, and usually makes what chance of friendship there was obsolete.

Hmm I do think it is good for single people to date, and not just try to wait till God brings the man or woman of their dreams to their door step. lets face it unless they are a door to door sales person ( and they are really few these days!) I don't think its gonna happen with out some work on your part. Nothing good ever comes easy. And you learn a lot about things you like and dislike through dating. Like oh, she talked about herself the whole time, or he was texting people through out the whole date and that is something that really bothers you you know, but you can't really get that out of your system and keep wondering about if she or he was the one if you say no to every guy or don't ever ask a girl out. And maybe initially you aren't that attracted to them, but maybe you have chemistry together and you wouldn't have known that if you never gave it a shot. Just maybe they are the one you have been looking for.